Rants and Articles.
In the cold of night
Night fell, and all around us the woods started to come alive. As the temperature dropped below zero, our usual lack of planning took a poignant turn: We still had about a hundred beers, five wine bottles, two pitchers of vodka…
And three sleeping bags.
For ten people.
At first it was funny, in the way that an ulcer of the colon tends to be funny. We shared a few more drinks and laughed about the whole thing.
Then it was cold.
Then our teeth started to chatter, our hands to tremble and we began to have trouble articulating coherent sentences (ok, that was the alcohol). The first few to break formation made a mad dash for the car. It would normally fit 5 people, tops, but seven guys and girls managed to squeeze in. That left Lydia, Ramon and me. We stared at each other for a while, and then Lydia and me tentatively grabbed two sleeping bags and slowly backed away from Ramon’s resentful stare.
Lydia and me were not involved in any way, so we made an honest attempt at sleeping in our respective bags, but we were still freezing our asses off, so it was decided that we would use one of the bags as a blanket and huddle together inside the other one.
What? It was a matter of survival!
We spooned together inside the sleeping bag. You have to understand, there was nothing sexual to this situation. This was more akin to that scene in “Empire” where Luke cuts up his camel thing and sleeps in its entrails. Only, you know… with less entrails. And more boobs. Which brings us to…
- Sergio?
- Yeah?
- You’re grabbing my tit.
- Am I?
- Yeah.
- mmm… no, I’m pretty sure this is your belly.
- No, you’re grabbing my tit. Stop it.
- I’m not grabbing your tit. You’re drunk.
- I think I’m qualified to know where my tits are. And you’re grabbing my tit. — By this point I just wanted to sleep, so I did the only thing I could.
- THIS is your tit!
- Ohmygod!! You grabbed my tit! Hey everyone! He grabbed my tit! Sergio grabbed my tit!!
The rest of the guys, being piss drunk and freezing, were not in the mood for lenghty discussions, so they just shouted from the car.
- Sergio, did you grab her tit?
- Um… yeah… just did.
- Left one or right one?
- Right one.
- Good! Now grab the other one and play bounce or something, if that will shut up the both of you! We’re trying to sleep here, assholes!
We giggled non-stop for the rest of the night.
— sergio on August 02, 2005 
Comments
I am sure you grabbed her tits to keep your hands warm and to keep you fingers from frostbit.
:-)
Ha,ha, funny!
What if she was right and he had been grabbing her third one all along?
Me encanta leerte! : )
Hehehehehehehehe.. the story was hilarious. Sergio you did it again.
Freud Freud… I wonder, if you were not grabbing the boob at first… who was?!?!?!?!?! That Ramon may have Ninja-like powers and decided to stick around to warm up as well :P
Ya tenemos los chocolates para ver la movie! :) hablanos!
It was in fact, not Sergio who was grabbing the tit, but the tit that was grabbing Sergio! Aha!
No way. Sergio was grabbing the tit.
Nice story. LOL!!
Please turn in your geek card.
We no longer need you.
That was a funny read, nice.
Way to go Sergio! Using the old sleeping bag trick. Works even better than the out-of-gas routine.
Fucking hilarious and there is no way I could share a sleeping bag with a woman without some action occurring. You are a greater man than me.
LOL !!, Ok cousin you really cheer my day up!.. I want to camp like that too pal!.
Uproarious story. Keep them comming.
Kitta is right, it is rude not to name them. They need to be personal names too, easy to remember. Funny story as well,but you forgot to tell us if you evened out the score. Did you grab the other one. Cause tits can get jealous you know.:P
I think if I had to name a pair of tits, they’d be Ebony and Ivory.
Keeping one’s hands safe from frostbite is, indeed, HARD work (hah! I made a pun!)
Jajajaja! no mames!
Haha, underbart!
Did the tit you grabbed have a name? It’s rude to grab and not to name them you know. ;o)