Rants and Articles.
Paranoid humanoid
When I was just a little pup, I was convinced that I didn’t actually look like I thought I looked.
Deeply convinced.
I’m talking massive conspiracy of epic proportions here. Picture this: all mirrors and reflective surfaces in sync, always alert and vigilant in order to present me with an image other than that which I really had. Radios and high tech surveillance equipment working 24/7, informing people of my approach so they could put on a straight face (the otter has left the nest… the platipii are awaiting. I repeat. The platipii are awaiting…) This led me to have conversations like this:
- Sooo… Nice weather, huh?
- Yeah. Nice.
- I couldn’t help but notice that the sky does not look green at all…
- Um… Yeah. Not green.
- Like my nose.
- Huh?
- You know. My green nose.
- Huh?
- You’re in on it, right? You’re part of them! My nose! Is it green? Tell me!! Confess!! Don’t run, you bastard!!!
I’m happy to report that things have gotten somewhat better since then. I only seldom have doubts about the true color of my appendages now.
Like my yellow ears…
— sergio on June 07, 2004 
Comments
This is how ‘things have been getting better’ since I know sergio:
1. Reflective surfaces are lying (as in Sergio’s story).
2. Physiscs is lying, as in: ‘I AM strong! I could beat the crap out of you with one… WAIT!!! NO!!! ‘
3. Mathematics is lying, as in: ‘So I did not study. So I solved my analytic geometry exam with a ruler and a piece of string. So my procedure is not in the books. So my answers have nothing to do with the professors answers. BUT I AM STILL RIGHT AND DESERVE A FULL GRADE!’
4. All girls are lying, as in: ‘I SWEAR she is looking at me. She likes me, I can see that. Man, this is love at first sight, the look… … … She is just kissing him to make me jealous!’
I could go on like this for ages, lets zoom to the last one.
5. Google is lying, as in: ‘Overcaffeinated, THE COMIC.’
Agree! Google is lying!
HAHAHAHA!!!
you made my day Salamastre! Bravo!
but this thingie says I am a spammer, thank you very much Sergio!!! >_
Sergio, the only reflective surface in your house right now is your head….
hehehe
However…. you know I know about your green nose and your purple nipples….
—“I know about your green nose and your purple nipples….”
Aha! I knew that other post was talking about the nipples on his psyche.
Nyah, nyah, Sergio has psychic nipples and you don’t!
and your massive amounts of silver hair right?