I just moved out on my own. Prior to this, I shared the parental home with the brothers and —sometimes— mother (she spends a lot of time in Chicago, with father).

To many foreign readers it may seem odd that I’m emancipating at 28 years of age, but you’d be making the mistake of judging mexican society according to extraneous sets of rules. Let’s just say that over here, emancipation is not encouraged. It is even considered a forceful insult in some cases. Most mothers’ mantra: You leave the house…

• To study abroad.
• To marry (a broad?).
• Dead.

Hence, it took a while to convince the female parental unit that it was about time for me to just go on my own, but she eventually understood my point of view, and we’re still on good terms.

I’ve been alone on my apt for more than a month now. This is my rough diary of the first few days:

Day 1: This is awesome! It’s freaking freaking great! It would be even greater if I wasn’t so knackered from moving all the furniture in! And I still have to reassemble my futon!

I’ll try not to sleep on the floor!

And fail!

Day 2: Bad news: There is no water pressure in the shower. This is about the worst thing that could happen. Evar.

Also, it seems water heater is not working. Pretending to be zen monk while dousing ass with ice cold water. Ice cold pressureless water.

Current Zen meditation Mantra: HOLYFUCKINGMOTHERFUCKERFUCK!!!

Day 3: Watched “Ghostbusters” and “The Lost Boys” back to back. Confirmed theory of cinema worthiness. Theory of cinema worthiness states that the 80’s gave us the best Hollywood ever had to offer. Plus, anything with Kiefer Sutherland rocks. Anything with Kiefer Sutherland and Corey Feldman rocks harder.

Started (*gasp*) buying food.

• Bought meat, but no cooking oil.
• Bought cheese, but no tortillas.
• Bought butter, but no bread.
• Ended up eating sausages and cheese. Uncooked.

Water heater turned on, then turned itself off. Bathed with cold water. Balls the size of pine nuts at current time.

Day 4: Discovered true advantage of living alone: Walking naked all over the place.

Day 5: Discovered living room floor-to-ceiling window provides clear visibility from the street.

Hoping that girl who was passing by won’t press charges.

Day 6: Water heater displaying vexing behavior, proving itself a formidable foe. This is shaping up to be a battle of epic proportions.

• Water heater: 2
• Tenant: 0

Day 7: Had enough. Asked landlady to fix water heater and put some pressure in shower. Shower pressure problem turned out to be a clogged showerhead.

Water heater turned out to be automatic (it is apparent that there have been several advances in water heater technology since I last dabbled in its arcane secrets).

As the demonstration went on, Landlady kept repeating “you see, ENGINEER, you just turn this knob here and the water heater goes on automatic mode, like so”, “well, ENGINEER, yes, it will turn on when you need the hot water. By itself. Yes.”, “ENGINEER, it’s not the water pressure, the showerhead is just a bit clogged up…”.

I think that woman hates me.

Spent 2 hours picking at showerhead with pin. Eyed water heater suspiciously for rest of evening.

— sergio at 12:07 PM     TrackBack (0)

Yesterday I turned 28. As I continue on well past the quarter century, there is one thing that consistently eludes me: writing.

I recently moved to my own place, broke up a relationship, went on to continue that relationship in a somewhat twisted fashion, helped move my schizophrenic aunt into an asylum, and generally had a weird couple of months. All through this, there have been innumerable things to write about, but I just haven’t had the stomach.

That’s about to change. Things are finally starting to settle down, and I’m seeing some kind of stability in the horizon, which at this point, is good enough.

About the birthday: It was very nice. I got insanely great presents from Angie, kitta (well, I *assume* it’s nice, since it’s still on the way… for all I know, it’s wallaroo droppings in a box) and the ex. I usually treat myself on my birthdays, and this time I decided on a worthy purpose:

I’ll eat half a cow”

If you’re ever in Guadalajara, make sure you stop by La Matera and order the 2-person plate of “Entraña”. It’s really nice on the stomach, and you only have to work a bit into it to realize that the whole “2 person” concept is flimsy suggestion, at best.

So I had my half a cow, gifts, a lot of calls, a few beers with friends, good conversation and half the day off.

It was good.

Didn’t get a blowjob, though.

Got to set sights on that one for next year.

— sergio at 01:13 AM     TrackBack (0)